Ah, what a day. I was really hoping for a good night's sleep last night. I have moved into Liana's room on a blow up mattress so that she's not alone so you'd think that would be enough, right? Guess not. I got one so-so night's sleep since I moved into her room, where she didn't wake up til (gasp) 5:30. Pretty exciting. But she hasn't done it since. Last night, she woke up at 1 and then again at 4:30. In between Liana's wake ups, I heard Ella sniffling in the bathroom so I went to see what was wrong. Poor girl was burning up and feeling terrible. I got her some Ibuprofen and layed with her a little while and then left, hoping she would fall back asleep quickly. After missing 11 days of school and only being back for 4, I hated emailing her teacher that she was going to miss another day...well, it's really only a half day today but still.
Erik had always said that he would take our first week back at home off from work so that Liana could adjust and so could we before he disappeared back to the daily grind. I should be laughing because I knew it wouldn't be that simple. He has worked some of every day since we've been back and today, after I assured Ella that I would be able to spend a lot of time taking care of her today since Daddy's home, Erik informed me that he was going to have to work the whole day, not just the afternoon like he thought. Yay. So, fast forward a couple of hours and a couple more kids awake and Ella is throwing up in a bowl and a little on herself and the love seat while Liana is trying to get closer to see what's going on and Ethan is wreaking havoc in the background. I help hold the bowl for Ella and when she's done, quickly get Ethan and Liana into the playroom so I can clean everything up. Liana has decided that having neither Erik or I in the room is just not okay in the last few days so she just sits by the baby gate crying. If we're not in the room, we can never tell if Ethan is actually doing anything mean to her or not because she's a bit of a drama queen and a little instigator too. I have actually seen her walk up to Ethan and then cry because he's close to her. It's interesting how kids so young manipulate you, isn't it? Very clever, new daughter, but I'm a quick study. Fast forward another 6 or so hours, Ella's temp has gone up to 104.8. I try to call a nurse but they don't answer. It's 4:30 so the doctor's office is closing soon. I give her ibuprofen, pediasure and pop her in a luke warm bath while I stick Ethan and Liana back in the playroom. Ethan escapes the playroom so I have to bust out crying Liana too. Erik's cell phone went dead right after getting to work so I try his work phone. No answer. I get Ella out, dressed and back on the loveseat with a blanket on her lap. Her temp goes down to 103.1...102.3...whew.... Erik makes it home and orders pizza and offers to sleep in Liana's room tonight. Yes, he's my knight in shining armor...err, khakis.
I have always heard how the first week home is hard but this is more than I bargained for. I have not slept well one single night since we've been home, Ella has gotten a cold and the flu (did you know that you could have both at the same time? I didn't!), I'm sick again and my muscles around my ribs are still sore, Ethan has been coming down with a cold and I found a stitch that was left in his head so I need to take him to the doctor to have that removed, and I just have no idea how to balance being a mom to three yet. I know, I know, mamas of more than three out there, you're thinking, three?! I could handle three kids in my sleep! Well, I can't. And it is so different bringing home a toddler versus a newborn baby. It's a lot easier to adjust to adding a new child when that child can't get into things or fight with their new siblings and sleeps most of the day and hasn't spent the first two years of their life in an orphanage on the other side of the world. Adding a two year old when you already have a two year old, well, that's just nutso! I know, I knew what I was getting myself into and yes, I saw those unspoken reactions when we told people that we were adopting Liana. But ya know what, I knew it was insane from the start. I can't tell you how many times I've had a rough day with Ethan or Ella or both and asked God if I could really do this. The thing is, it was His plan, not ours. We have laughed about it many, many times (nervously, mind you) wondering why this was God's plan and how we would manage to even get through the adoption to Liana and then how we would handle things once we brought our dear girl home. But I can't tell you what a perfect fit Liana is for us and I hope we are for her too. Is she sometimes a drama queen? Yes, but Ella and yes, I can be drama queens too. Ask my poor husband! Does she try to pull fast ones on us to get her brother into trouble? Oh yeah, but you can bet he's also trying to do sneaky things to be mean to her behind our backs and then give us that little innocent look when we turn around. She is also hilarious and sweet and charming and fun and full of spunk and a tease and extremely cute and somehow, even though we're just getting to know her, she just fits us. All of us. It's not perfect by any means and I haven't even begun to learn how to work my way through each day with three kiddos, two who are two (I always have to add that) but we'll get there. It will never be perfect. Sadly, I will never be a perfect mom but we'll get better and better at this as we figure out what our life is now like as a family of five.